I've just returned from Punch Drunk Love, and I'm quite smitten. Lately, any film that takes place in L.A. wins me over. But for Adam Sandler's...performance to actually earn my respect? I never thought that day would arrive.

One of the contacts I established through the Mizzou Mafia informs me that a certain talentless, troll-like former Maneater critic resides in L.A. Why do I get the feeling that the city isn't large enough for me to hide from her? Apparently the two had lunch and my name came up. Oh great. I'm sure my name was tarnished, as Miss Zoolander has very few uplifting words to offer on subjects that don't relate to herself, being Jewish, or both.