American audition

My American Idol audition is in two weeks, and I can honestly say that I've never been so consumed with something before. What song will I sing? What if that song doesn't show off my voice like I thought it would? What if I'm wearing something boring that had earlier seemed cutting edge? Why is my hair so short? How will my vocal chords suffer from sleeping outside for two days? If I make it to the Simon-Paula-Randy round, will I kiss ass and say something humiliating on national television? Will my nerves contort my voice into a nervous shriek that makes it onto the horrible audition reel? What if I make it to the top 12? Who will I invite to come watch? How will all this affect my plans to move to Hollywood with Melinda? What will I wear? What if I have to talk to Ryan Seacrest?

I'd say that gives an accurate summation of my thoughts during this past week.