Pop, thix, thquish, Thithero...

I knew I'd like the film version of Chicago better than the stage production. However, I had no idea why the Lyric production would grate on my nerves.

It started with "Cell Block Tango." The spoken introduction by each of the female cast members was going fine until I heard Velma (Debbie Gibson) say, "Thithero." A few numbers later, she sang, "I thimply cannot do it alone," followed by "Nowadayth." I figured the lisp was some odd way of getting into character, like Gibson was portraying her as a childish brat. Melinda's friend was in the cast, and a post-production phone call yielded the ugly truth...that Deborah Gibson's lisp was not a character nuance. I cannot, for the life of me, understand how the part of a vampy seductress went to a former pop star with a speech impediment. Velma Kelly should not have a lisp anymore than the Terminator should.

That said, I enjoyed the show infinitely more after downing four Baileys on the rocks during intermission and the second act. I mean Baileyth on the rockth.