Sometimes it's worth it

Brentwood is filled with yuppy white bitches of no class who married into money and feel a certain reign over the working class. Because I grew up in the affluent environment of a private school (and, let's face it, because I grew up in money), I am immune to this "purchased" form of wealth. Money is fine, but you're either born with manners and social graces, or not. Case in point, look at Lil Kim. Once a piece of ghetto trash, always a piece of ghetto trash. Class can't be bought.

So when someone of this married-into-money mentality adopts a condescending attitude with me, it usually awakens the most vitriolic of my ire. I am accustomed to old money, which is rarely an incentive for people to treat others as inferior. While my friends and I were snotty in high school, we never tipped poorly or made a server feel like a lesser human being.

Tonight I got in trouble at the restaurant for one acerbic comment that came out not as a result of what a woman said, but the way she looked right past me when speaking to me.

I was at the host stand, talking to my friend (the hostess), when this trashy faux-golden haired bitch came in with her flashy Louis Vuitton purse and Lindsay Lohan sunglasses. Looking right past us and completely interrupting our conversation, she said, "I need a really big table." As I'm sure you know, when most people enter a restaurant, they do not request tables in sizes. They request tables according to the number of people in a party. So when this woman, whose attitude and demeanor I've encountered a million times before, said something so stupid as "I need a really big table," one response sprang from my mouth without so much as a second though. I said,

"Might I suggest a furniture store?"

The woman, clearly not a fan of witty banter, snarled at me and went straight for the manager. I got a slap on the wrist (a sit-down! THE SHAME!) and several hateful looks from the woman and her Stepford camp. All in a days work for a man just trying to wage the war on derivative wealth and shallow class.